November 2011
3 posts
Praying
Wishing with every fiber of my being that when I walk out of class tomorrow you’ll be sitting there on those steps like you used too. Waiting for me. Considering a hundred different scenarios of how I should react when I see you, if I see you. Just turn and walk away or talk to you as if none of it ever happened. But then again you probably wouldn’t even bother to make an appearance...
Trying to be strong.
I’m so mad at you. I just want to kick and scream because I have all this residual anger inside of me. If I were alone with you..honestly? I don’t even know what I would do. I really want to pour a glass of water in your face or just scream at you. Maybe even cause a scene and storm away just to see if you would come after me. But do you know what I really want to do? What I keep...
I miss being with someone who knew me better than...
Whenever I would feel like shit and I would take it out on you. When I would ask you whether or not you knew why I was mad because in all honesty I wouldn’t even know myself. When you would reach into my thoughts and phrase exactly what I was feeling and why I was hurting and then even…apologize for it. Moments like those made me think that we we’re going to last.
October 2011
10 posts
Am I a bad friend? →
Just because I don’t sympathize for you, and don’t run to your aid every time you think your world is crashing before your eyes? If you need me to listen, I’m there. Don’t hesitate, no judgement. I used to think this was enough, but apparently it isn’t. No, I’ll be straight up. When people look at you with sadness in their eyes and pity you because of what you’ve been through, you can count me...
Insomnia
My whole body is aching. I can’t sleep. My eyes are wet, my throat dry. What is wrong with me? Why can’t I stop? I’m mentally exhausted, I don’t want to think anymore. But physically, I’m restless… relentless. I’m jittery, and cold, uncomfortable in all positions, but no matter how I move, comfort doesn’t come and close my weary eyes. You aren’t here and that’s all that really matters. Insomnia...
I think the only reason everyone holds on to...
im-kingclassy:
Boy, I’m in a shitty mood. :)
Letter Challenge: Dear Anonymous →
You shouldn’t, but you still do. It’s all you look forward to in your life nowadays. Why shouldn’t you be happy? You’ve dealt with a lot of shit in your life. Don’t you deserve it? It’s not your fault that he’s the only one who can make you happy. Why does the happiness of others always have to come before yours? ”Why do I have to stop?”
Finally, it’s what you’ve been waiting for. The day when...
Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten... →
I find this extremely difficult because I usually say what I want to say, but let’s try this anyway.
1. Okay, I get it. You don’t like me, but at least attempt to be civil. How about instead of talking shit about me behind my back, be a man about it and tell me how you feel to my face so that I don’t have to pretend that I like you.
2. Stop being so reckless. You’re my friend but you need...
Day 11 - someone deceased you wish you could talk... →
Hey Grandpa,
It’s been awhile. I miss you. I didn’t take advantage of your company when you were around and it’s something I regret. You helped raise me into the person I am today by working day in and day out as a restaurant cook. I should have taken advantage of the little free time you had and listened to the stories you had to share or the wisdom you had to offer, but instead I complained...
30 Day Letter Challenge. →
Inspired by riskeverythingfearnothing, this is the 30 day letter challenge. I will write these at my leisure and I probably won’t go in order.
Day one - your best friend Day two - your crush Day three - your parents Day four - your sibling Day five - your dreams Day six - a stranger Day seven - your ex/love/crush Day eight - your favorite internet friend Day nine - someone you wish you could...
I feel as if I’m losing myself. →
(picvia leilockheart)
As I’ve learned in my beginner’s Psych class, you go through those stages of self-discovery throughout your teenage years, so why is it now that I feel as though the identity I worked so hard to maintain and cultivate is slowly being chipped away? Usually the friendly, approachable, and outgoing type, now I find it difficult to even feign interest in conversation with...
This is what you do to me. →
(picvia leilockheart)
How do you continue to go about your life as if nothing has changed? When all the time and effort you spent on one person was all for nothing? When who they are is the single embodiment of everything that you once were and now it’s as if you’ve had no part in it. Eventually the lies stop having their effect in temporarily relieving the pain like they once did and you...
Only you can control your own happiness. →
I think that the reason that I’m so obsessed with motivational quotes is because I lack optimism. People have faith because it gives their life purpose, a reason to continue living, a belief that there is more to life after death. What about those who continue living for the sake of living? Whos’ singular driving purpose is not what benefits there are to be reaped in the afterlife but to enjoy...